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America’s War on Dogs

April 18, 2012

No dogs allowed Français : Chien interdit Česk...

God I hope nobody beat me to that headline, but I’m sure a few hundred did.

Sorry ladies, your 12 days of being important and listened to are officially over.  The war on women has called a cease fire so we can all fight the REAL battle – America’s war on dogs.

Barack Obama’s campaign team is absolutely freakin genius.   Everybody in the state of Massachusetts was just waiting for the dog thing to come up.  It’s not news.

Side note: everything stated here is analysis, not my personal opinion.  Ok, some of it is opinion.

Barack Obama knows that the current state of the economy has the potential to end his reign.  His best strategy is clearly to avoid that conversation as much as possible.  Don’t get me wrong, he firmly believes that his plans will save our economy in the long run but he also knows that the average American doesn’t want to read 1,240 pages of economic reform and projections; they just want to look at their bank account statements.  But Obama’s team didn’t bring up the dog issue because they thought it was important, they were just baiting Romney.  I mean, do you really think Obama’s PR people don’t know every word Obama has ever written or said?  They knew that bringing up Romney’s animal cruelty would be countered with an attack on Obama’s childhood culinary adventures.  And they knew that it would effectively distract our country for a good long time and take our minds off of issues more likely to actually hurt his campaign.

And no, sampling dog in Indonesia as a child will not harm his campaign.  I would like to hear from anyone who has actually decided to vote for Romney because Obama ate Benji.  I’d like to think that most of us realize that what Obama did here was not a big deal (unless you are a vegetarian altogether, which I would respect).   Eating puppy chili would be considered one of the easy tests on Fear Factor and shows like Bizarre Foods on the Food Network do this kind of stuff all the time.  I’m going to get a little opinionated here.  I am a dog person.  My dog means the world to me.  But it’s not like Obama went and ate some 7 year old child’s seeing eye dog when there was lobster and filet mignon on the table at home.

And to Glen Beck who wrote an exceptionally insightful blog about this issue – I find it very hard to believe that you have never eaten anything of the same species as a beloved pet of countless Americans.  Perhaps not a dog, but I’ll have a little more respect for your opinion when you either go vegetarian or start shipping your leftover ham and steak to starving children overseas*.

And when the card carrying PETA members go to vote, they’re going to just choose some Green Party yahoo you’ve never heard of regardless (which isn’t to say that the Green Party yahoo won’t be a much better candidate than Romney or Obama because they probably will be.)

Number of people who have converted from Obama to Romney because of this:  1,472

Number of days that undecided voters have effectively been distracted from real issues:  TBD

Numbers of Romney supporters that will switch to Obama because it’s much more inhumane and cruel to put a family pet in a cage in the top of your car than gaining insight on a culture that may eat dogs occasionally because it’s the only way to feed starving humans:  248,762

Number of Americans who have officially stopped caring:  187,233

You do the math.

*  Ok, I’m sure Glen has done some wonderful charity work and helped a lot of people (that was not sarcastic).  But I doubt he has ever gone hungry for any signifigant length of time.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. April 19, 2012 1:47 am

    Oh you sure do bring up some very good points. I admire you! I love the topics you write about.

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  1. Take This, Candidates « Everything Needs to Change

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